Faults, Failures and Flaws.

Traveling

On a recent flight I was rereading the book "Fish" by Stephen C. Lundin and Harry Paul.  This is a quick read in the genre of business fables.  The first rule of the Fish Philosophy is "Choose Your Attitude."  When I read this mantra, it hit me in the gut. These words were a direct indictment to me.

A friend asked me to perform a favor.  A favor that many people would find enjoyable, but that put me outside of my comfort zone.  Instead of approaching this favor with a kind and giving heart, I fought against the situation and created a negative spiral of events.  Then, I made excuses for my attitude and actions.  I placed the blame on the actions of those around me, including my friend.  I blamed the fact that I was tired.  I was completely self-absorbed and could find fault with everything and everyone else around me.  I refused to look in the mirror, at myself.

Sitting on the flight and reading "Choose Your Attitude," I finally had to admit the truth to myself.  I had chosen to have a poor attitude, just like some of the characters in the book "Fish".  It took me a few moments to process this information.  I am generally known to be bubbly, optimistic, and cheerful.  I knew, though, that I was at fault for not even trying to have fun. I had failed my friend. I looked into the mirror of my heart and I was flawed.

It is difficult sometimes to look into the true reflection of ourselves and to see the parts, which we want to deny exist.  At the moment, I had to be completely honest about three things: I was at fault, I had failed, and I was flawed.

I again pondered "Choose Your Attitude."  Now that I was confronting the window into my soul, I needed to choose a different attitude.  I needed to embrace forgiveness, friendship, and forthrightness.

First, I needed to forgive myself.  It is difficult to accept when we are at fault, when we fail, that we are flawed.  We are all imperfect. We are all flawed.  It is only through arrogance that one thinks they are above these things.  After accepting and forgiving myself, I knew the next step would be to ask the forgiveness of my friend.

Second, I needed to accept that friendship can and does overlook our failures, our faults and our flaws.  Good friends are a treasure. In my life I am extremely blessed to have so many fantastic friends. Friends who are there for me, even when I try to push them away.

Finally, I needed to be forthright.  I needed to be frank and honest about the situation.  It is so easy to make excuses for our faults, failures and flaws.  I am quick to blame others, to justify my actions, and to shift responsibility to another.  I need to be forthright regarding my attitude.  I need to choose my attitude and accept responsibility.

In the end, I hope people read this and realize that you "Choose Your Attitude."  We need to recognize that everyone has faults, has failures, and is flawed.  We need to forgive ourselves and others, embrace our friends, and be forthright.

I am also hopeful, that my friend will read this, and forgive me.